Play ball

The kids played their first ever organized baseball game today.  They had fun and their team (winless last year) won!  I have been thrilled to witness the blossoming of their interest in baseball and feel great joy that they are achieving their dreams of playing on a team.

They both walked twice and struck out once.  Gem got to cross home plate.  Sag stole second base once but was left stranded there, unfortunately.  They played a variety of positions during the game and saw no direct action while fielding.

It was a wonderful start to the season!

Spring craft fair

The kids and I spent a lovely couple of hours at the semi-annual homeschool craft fair, this afternoon.  The boys played and I hung out and admired the creative crafts.  It is such a gift to watch these kids grow up...as well as, meeting the new babies who just keep coming :-)

a breezy Spring day.

 free with purchase...my favorite item of the day.

I bought a purple sleeping one.

 Bridget (the teru teru bozu and save the word cards crafter) and Shannon.

 Kelly's latest baby, Albert.

 Tiina making an Earth Day kite at Bridget and Leo's table.

 Ada and her beautiful paintwork (she did Bridget's tiger face...see above).

Melody's baby, Asher.  I got to hold him today, how lucky am I?

Lucy made this bird.  she's my go to artisan...we share a sense of aesthetics :-)

Starting

What he wanted to do this morning...Gem and I have been helping.  

Repair on the first floor hall ceiling has begun.  

After a quick lunch we are off to the Spring Homeschool Craft Fair.

Endless

I wish I could bottle this crisp sunny breezy morning.  Riles me up with joy.

My heart goes out to the souls departed and the ones who are surviving the tornadoes and storms in the South.

Soothed by this piece:



The rhythm of qigong grounds me as the creaks quiet and the energy flows.

I dreamt last night that a vampire came close and I discovered I was one of them deep down inside...

A rabbit's story

I read this book a couple of years ago and found it quite arresting.  I started reading it aloud to the kids this week and they are mesmerized.

My first

I'm already calling today a wash...between menstruality, a tornado warning and the ceiling incident and subsequential thoughts of moving and all that would entail...oh and being nasty to the kids who do not deserve that...

Taking a breath and enjoying my first butt text.  Smile.

The writing is on the...

ceiling?

I've been looking at local apartment listings for the last hour.  All a-jitter.  Off to qigong.

(No one was hurt and that is important to remember.  Happened in the dead of night, no one heard it.  The location of this mishap is the front entrance to the house, in a common hall space.)

Gettin' eggy with it

Hard boiled pastured local eggs (oh the color, oh the texture, oh the flavor).  Place eggs in pot.  Just cover with water.  Cover pot.  Bring to a boil.  Turn off the stove.  Leave as is for 8-10 minutes (I always strive for 8).  Drain water and refill pot to overflowing for a couple of minutes until the pot is cool and the water in the pot remains cool.  (Alternately, place eggs in a bowl with cold water.)  Place ice in water.  (Getting the eggs really cold after cooking = easier peeling.)  Leave for awhile.  Put eggs in fridge for later use/peel eggs and eat.

On my toast today: mayo and chickpea miso.  Lunch was heaven.  I made too much though, and it was not a meal that was going to keep well for leftovers.  Thought for my next meal: choose my plate/bowl mindfully and do not exceed that plateful/bowlful.

Checking out this restaurant in Barcelona.  The city is foodie/design heaven.  My excitement grows by the day.

Mid-morning

Munching on Bosc pears this mid-morning.  A bit of fresh, sweet fruit, a wonderful pick-me-up during this time between breakfast and lunch.

Marveling minutiae

Yesterday late afternoon, I free fell into Free Cell.  I usually play at least once a day on the iPhone.  It's not an addiction, per se, but it certainly does something to me neurochemically.  Hmm.  Maybe it is an addiction.

Anyway, I played on and off for a few hours, the latter part of the evening while watching the Red Sox game.  My "limited screen" awareness didn't kick in until it was way too late.  Not till I came out of my playing fog.

It was a strange evening.  I didn't eat dinner until quite late and even then I wasn't very hungry.  I did have the mind-body connection enough to eat something at hand (though I felt that tug of take out...this is the "activation" issue my brain has...an ADD strand).  I also managed enough clarity to keep this late meal small.

I stayed up late to watch Glee after the game was over.  I was really tired, but something kept me upright.  I was leaden by the time I dragged myself to wash up before hitting the hay.  **TMI alert**  I was surprised by a huge poop followed by a gut-cleaning release.  (I've been taking a TCM herb concoction called Master Cleanse for over a week now which definitely seems to be doing something along those lines...)

I laid awake for a bit wondering if I had insomnia.  By this point it was past 1am.

Then, I fell asleep.  And slept well.  I woke once and was surprised that neither of the kids had migrated to the bed.

**TMI alert**  This morning I was surprised to see light, bright pink on the toilet paper after my morning pee.  A period beginning with no usual PMS.  No cramping.  No raging emotion.  I did finish my burnt caramel-Hawaiian sea salt bar yesterday, one delicious section after the other.

A period in more flow.  Brownish blood is indicative of stagnation (the older the blood is, the darker and browner it will be).  Pink blood always makes me happy.

Maybe it's the emotional digestion I've accomplished this month.

Maybe it's the Master Cleanse herbs.

Maybe it's the few days in a row of qigong practice.

Maybe it's the occasional flaxseed/evening primrose oil I've been taking.

Feeling groovy.  I hope you find your groove today, too.

P.S.  Reading this piece over, I noticed I used the word "late" repeatedly.  A construct of time, as well as, of judgment/expectation/predetermination.  Another point of minutiae it could be argued.  But, a detail that is not lost on me.

P.P.S.  Periods, perimenopause and menopause don't have to be rough.

P.P.P.S.  Attending quietly and restfully to my body today.  Skipping qigong this morning, seeing Vinny this afternoon, considering practicing #10 tonight.

Music to my ears

 Shel Silverstein Appreciation Society.

The kids are enjoying the poetic works of Shel Silverstein.  They have been inspired to read these poems aloud, which is, as they say, music to my ears.

Sag read The Missing Piece while waiting for Gem to be done copying his poem of the day from Where The Sidewalk Ends.  They are both eager to read The Missing Piece Meets The Big O, which I ordered from the local bookshop today (along with Falling Up), to celebrate National Poetry Month.

(It was lovely to hear Sag read aloud the inscription in our copy of The Missing Piece, a commitment ceremony gift to Cap and me from Jamie :-)

Happy feet

Yes.

In other news...

• Gem seems to have a reaction to upticks in artificial color/flavors in his system.  Makes him emo.  He's been chowing on Peeps and jelly beans and last night, at dinner, Donna mentioned my upcoming trip to Spain...he disintegrated, emotionally, right before my eyes.  He was teary for a couple of hours and had a good cry before falling asleep (a gentle but vigorous belly rub helped).  To be fair, he has been more emotional lately.  But, there was something about the quality of this emotional dip that made me think there was something other than natural hormonal shenanigans going on.

• Practiced qigong again this morning.  So far, so good.  

• Did spend less time at a screen yesterday.  Did read more (sections of Women with Attention Deficit Disorder and Planting Seeds).  Felt more mentally clear and able to face challenging situations more authentically.  (Getting angry, expressing it directly at the point of feeling it, calming down, recognizing my desire to invite compassion, communicating my awareness of what I learned about how I acted and my desire to move on more mindfully, expressing my realization of how badly that person must have already been feeling when they connected with me and had to share bad news, apologizing for the fact that I must have only made them feel worse...I was heard and reassured that my reaction felt natural and that it was understood as an emotional reaction and not a personal attack.)

Peace and love to you.

Keeping it simple

I could feel some tightness in my upper back and neck on the left side.

The kids were working pretty independently on some Math so I put on some Sigur Ros (off my Qigong playlist) and practiced #10 whilst they did their thing.

The song was about five minutes long and by then Sag had something he wanted to show me.  I could feel the pain that had begun to set in, from taut flesh and stagnant energy, was gone.

But, the area was still tight.  So, I practiced Rocking The Baby Dragon, one of the exercises Vinny had recommended to open that particular area up.

That helped some more.

Then, I remembered the tennis ball.

In an unusual move of organization, I've had a tennis ball stashed in a special place for awhile.  In a typical way, I haven't remembered to use it, for the same while.

A tennis ball is a great massager.  Place it between your back and a wall and roll around.  You can control the pressure and though it can be painful, it is also delicious.

My neck's range of motion has improved significantly and my upper back feels, simply, wide open...like it can breathe.

Salad days

Salad is becoming more common around here as we discovered that Sag really likes it while we were in Japan.  (During a meal he was fed by my sister on a night Cap and I went out.)

It's not Dragon-y because of its raw/coldness.  But, it sure brightens up a table, especially on a cloudy day like today.

I have shifted to green tea and Master Lu's teas.  The Yogi green is quite bright, adding some warming antioxidant cheer to my afternoon.

Lyrical langston

April Rain Song

Let the rain kiss you.
Let the rain beat upon your head with silver liquid drops.
Let the rain sing you a lullaby.

The rain makes still pools on the sidewalk.
The rain makes running pools in the gutter.
The rain plays a little sleep-song on our roof at night---

And I love the rain.

Langston Hughes

Reading to the kids today.  From Caroline Kennedy's A Family of Poems.

I'm elliptical

Woke this morning and my GI system was growling.  I consumed a lot of dairy yesterday trying to "get rid" of it all before the new start today.

Pause.

I mean, really...how muddled is that mind set?  Let me "dispose" of this stuff into my body because it's the easy way out.  No guilt about putting it into the trash, no hassle of trying to find another home for it.

Pause again.

Interesting, you could say that about the clutter in the apartment, the stuff that, in my opinion, we have way too much of.  (Part of the issue is our lack of functional storage space.)  Things are disposed of all over the place, muddling efforts for clarity.

Anyway, I could tell running out the door was not a good idea.  My gut was "talking" to me.  So I practiced qigong instead.  And realized about 20 minutes into it that my brain chemistry was being altered.  By the time I was done it had been 30 minutes, I had broken a sweat and felt, if not a rush of endorphins, a really nice hug of them.

I almost did it again.

Sought from an external source what I can give myself.

I was/am feeling a little desperate.  It's my Spring thing.  It's nature's Spring thing.  We're all connected.  There is a surging, pushing, forceful energy that comes with Spring.  It demands growth.  It is a call for change that comes from the deepest roots and reaches for the outermost edges.

Yes, I want to be healthy/healthier.  Yes, I want to lose weight.  Yes, I want to look good.  Yes, I want to feel good.  Yes, I want to live as long as I can and enjoy my life, particularly my children and my partner.

I don't know why it is so hard to just do it.

Any of it.

A few weeks ago I set out to practice Dragon's Way leading up to my going away.  And somehow, I flitted away from that.  And then I "figured out" that joining the Y was the answer.  (There was the home elliptical machine in the middle there, too.)

It's easier for me to set my eyes on these externals and rationalize, rather than patiently train them inwards and contemplate.

Returning to the mantra: keep things simple. 

In the face of all this energy, to combat freely flowing radicals, to bring it down a notch.

Eat less, eat mostly veggies, practice qigong, limit screen time, read more, talk to friends.

Simple.

The kindness of strangers

...or in this case, the friend of friends.

Last week, our upstairs neighbors went away on vacay.  A friend of theirs apartment-sat and minded their pooch.  He was incredibly quiet.  So quiet that the dog often didn't realize he was home until he was in the apartment (having climbed two flights of stairs and opened and closed two doors).

I only ran into him once and we exchanged shy smiles through a car window.

On his second to last day I finally knocked on their door to make sure he was okay and didn't need anything (I kept thinking I'd run into him, and kept not doing so).

Then this:

Turns out he works at a cheese factory in Clifton.  And on Friday, he brought home this freshly grated Asiago cheese.  Our neighbors were due home that day, but they keep almost- to completely vegan, so he gave the cheese to us.

For real.  The kindness of strangers is a special brand of kind.

I will enjoy this for dinner tonight tossed with Biaglut gluten-free pasta and some good olive oil and black pepper.  Pasta this way reminds me of the last meal I ate before giving birth to Gem.  A big plate of pasta to fortify me through the labor that was finally progressing (after a week of starts and stops).  Happy memories, happy eating.

Easter

This year is the first Easter in recent memory that we are not in Massachusetts.  It has been, and always will be, Mummu's holiday.  But, one thing led to another and we are home and Mummu is celebrating with Jay and her family.

A highlight (dare I say, the highlight?) of Easter with Cap's family is the jelly bean hunt.  As the boys digested their disappointment at not celebrating on the Cape, one of the first questions that arose was: will there still be a jelly bean hunt?

Yes.  There were jelly beans to be hunted.

Quiet Sunday today.  The kids are playing with a friend and then have baseball practice this afternoon (first game tomorrow!)  The Sox and Celts play at the same time this afternoon during practice.  *Sigh*

Tomorrow begins a new chapter for me.  I'm going to finish vicing it out today/tonight.