After xmas

We hopped in the car the morning after Christmas and made our way to the homestead in the Commonwealth.  It was a whirlwind of family fun and reconnection to person and place jammed into three days.

Within an hour of being back home on Friday night, this was the scene in the big bed...

and as they fell quickly to sleep, I checked the phone messages and discovered my 75 year old dad who has more energy than me raring to come over for a visit.  (The man flew from Japan to California on the 18th, onto Alaska on the 20th, back to Cali around Christmas and then to NYC on the 28th.  He left me a message on the 28th to see if he could hop on NJ Transit to come over on the 29th.)

My inner introvert was at her wit's end.  But there was no way I was going to say no.  Saturday morning Cap was very supportive and accompanied me on needed errands while the kids chillaxed at home.  My dad came over and we spent a lovely few hours watching homemade movies, looking at photos of the northern lights, noshing on a light lunch, playing a Japanese card game called Daifugo, and enjoying sundaes.

Time together is, truly, priceless.

We are now fully ensconced in being together at home.  Each doing our own thing for the most part, coming together for food, laughs and hugs.  There will be the traditional Chinese take-out for dinner (sushi for Gem).  Three stooges for the boyfolk.  A ball will drop in Times Square.

And in the morning we will head to my parents' for Oshougatsu to welcome the Year of the Snake (of which we have two in our midst: Sag and Cap).

Wishing you gobs and gobs of peace and love as 2012 comes to a close and we begin 2013.

The year in books

I created intention to read more in 2012.  I picked 28 books to read.  I read 36.  Of the 36, only 9 were on the original list of 28.

I found Goodreads to be a motivating organizational resource to help me keep track of and write reviews of the books I read in 2012.  You can find me there under the moniker "musing manatee".

I read a mix of new novels, new-to-me novels, memoirs, young adult fiction and graphic novels.  I did not include the read aloud books I read to the kids.

My top three were: The Year We Left Home by Jean Thompson, Going Bovine by Libba Bray and Freedom by Jonathan Franzen.  These books left me breathless. 

The Year We Left Home blew me away because, for me, it came out of nowhere.  That there are gems like this book hidden from sight unless one is charmed enough to find it one's hands...this is an aspect of life and reading that I love.

Going Bovine I found utterly creative, surprising and inspired.  The anti-The Age of Miracles, which is the one book I read this year that I did not like.  Going Bovine is considered YA, but even if you aged out of that bracket long ago, do not let it stop you from picking it up.

Freedom was, simply, a powerhouse of language.  Franzen's facility with words, dialogue, character development is ferocious.  He is a master alchemist at capturing a moment in time and threading it through your insides and pulling it hard.  It's painful, cleansing, healing.

Also excellent and rating "five stars": 

Three Shadows by Cyril Pedrosa

Same Difference by Derek Kirk Kim

Nine Simple Patterns for Complicated Women by Mary Rechner

The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion

Last Night in Twisted River by John Irving

Another Bullshit Night in Suck City by Nick Flynn

Blue Nights by Joan Didion

Born Round by Frank Bruni

The Round House by Louise Erdrich

The Revolution Was Televised by Alan Sepinwall

The "four star" honorable mentions:

Empire State: A Love Story by Jason Shiga

The Wolves of Mercy Falls trilogy by Maggie Stiefvater

The Eternal Smile: Three Stories by Gene Luen Yang

Emily, Alone by Stewart O'Nan

A Life in Stitches by Rachael Herron

My Korean Deli by Ben Ryder Howe

Rat Girl by Kristin Hersh

A Greyhound of a Girl by Roddy Doyle

Stolen: A Letter to My Captor by Lucy Christopher

Let's Pretend This Never Happened by Jenny Lawson

11/22/63 by Stephen King

Sharp Objects by Gillian Flynn

Dark Places by Gillian Flynn

Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn

Riding the Bus with My Sister by Rachel Simon

Welcome to My World by Johnny Weir

The Twelve by Justin Cronin

The Wind-Up Girl by Paolo Bacigalupi

Wonder by R.J. Palacio

I have learned that a great graphic novel or young adult book is perfect for when you only have time (or the attention span) for a quick bite.

Also, that it is not wise to buy a bunch of books you think you want to read.  I had enough Xmas money to spend on six or seven books yesterday but decided to buy only the one I really wanted to read.  I have 14 books on the shelf that were bought in 2012 and remain unread (only some were picked up secondhand).

The library is a wonderful resource.  16 of the 36 books I read in 2012 were borrowed through my local branch.  Others were bought secondhand (at the library or the used bookshop in town), some were borrowed from friends, some were gifts, some we already had. 

I learned that I can be patient (contrary to a strong opposing sense of self-image).  I learned that there are unexpected treasures (so don't hoard).  I learned more about navigating desire, goals and flow.

I was reminded that the library is not the be all end all.  Every now and again I get a library book and realize...I just can't.  The other day my requested copy of Wolf Hall arrived and it was dingy.  Well loved.  There was something about the hand feel to the gray and even-more-than-paper thin pages that I knew would inhibit me.  (At other times it has been various smells or tacky mystery residue on the cover or within the pages.)  So I bought the paperback yesterday with gift money and will return the library book.

I was also reminded of how much I love curling up with a book and reading it.  All day.  I know now that this type of "world dropping away" experience is tied into being an introvert/highly sensitive.  It is not simply delighting in escape.  It's restorative meditation.  It is something I have done since childhood.  Having babies and parenting young kids forced a break in reading (watching great tv became a substitute...see The Revolution Was Televised) and it feels great to be getting back to it.

I don't know if there is room enough in my days for reading and knitting.  But, I have been thinking about reintegrating knitting.  Taking a, ahem, page from my reading experiment of 2012 may help in this endeavor.  Choosing a project and doing it.  Keeping it small and simple.  I am thinking about selling much of my stash in order to truly focus on projects I want to do.  Cut out the overwhelm of old goals and desires.

What did you read in 2012?  Please share recommendations.

Peace and books.

P.S.  I did not even touch on the stack of non-fiction reading I did/did not do!

P.P.S.  On deck for the beginning of 2013 for me: Wolf Hall by Hilary Mantle and Behind the Beautiful Forevers by Katherine Boo.

P.P.P.S.  This has been my favorite "best of 2012" list so far.

Previously on...

After blogging last Friday, I found out Sophie was going to be euthanized the next day.  Sophie was the elder of Barbra's canine kids.  Sophie was a fierce...well, bitch.  A miniature poodle who survived losing an eye in a freak accident, she lived a good long life giving and receiving a lot of love.  I knew I probably wouldn't see Sophie again when I visited Oakland in October.  So I got to give her an extra special good-bye squeeze.  I will miss her.

Dogs kill me.  I just love them.  (Though they are my third favorite animals after whales and horses, I get to revel in them the most.)  Saturday morning, Baxter quickly picked up on the fact that we were packing up to go somewhere.  He plunked himself right down on his blanket in the middle of the action.  I'm sure he was thinking we were leaving him.  (We didn't, he came in the car and we dropped him off at home where his people met him later in the day.)

We also dropped the kids off at my sister's.  For a rare overnight.  Them boys are growing up in many ways, lately.  Cap and I took the subway into the city for 24 hours of kid-free anniversary celebrating.

It was really relaxing.  And invigorating.  And yummy.  Gratitude to my sister and love.

On Sunday, we celebrated Christmas in Queens.  I was exhausted upon arrival and lay on the couch for a good while recovering energy.  By the time my brother's family arrived I felt better and we enjoyed the company and good eats.

On Christmas Eve the kids and I went to two playdates.  Then I watched a movie.  It was unexpectedly resonant.  I liked it a lot.  Loved the music.

Christmas was lovely.  The day was spent enjoying gifts, eating Chinese take-out and hanging out at home in pjs.  I read a nearly 400 page book that was seemingly written for me.

The next day, we road tripped to Massachusetts.  Pics to come...

Peace and love.

What he said

What a day.  An odd combination of it-whipped-by and feeling not only grounded, but very rooted.  Actually, it is fitting for the Winter Solstice, now that I think about it.

Rather than leave a trail of sentences noting this or that, a photo:

I made four things today, all for our Christmas get together in Queens on Sunday.  One was hot fudge sauce.  When I chopped the unsweetened dark chocolate, I paused...the aroma was intoxicating.  It was a wonderful moment.

(I also made caramel sauce, a dip I have become obsessed with called "Inge's Dip", and braised beef short ribs.)

I hope you are enjoying lovely moments.  Happy Solstice.

Peace.

Let there be light

While Cap slept (he started feeling crappy last night) and the kids did their chillaxing thing (Gem still feels under the weather, Sag felt good yesterday but less so today), I got out for a bit this morning to holiday shop and errand run.

I appreciated that the town gives free two-hour parking in the shopping districts during the holidays.

I appreciated walking into the butcher to order short ribs for tomorrow morning, crossing the street to the hardware store to pick up a replacement cord for the salt lamp, and quickly finding the last three books I needed at my beloved indie bookstore a block away.

I appreciated not being made to feel a fool when I realized I didn't know where the fuel door opener was in the car...I guess it was my first time getting gas.

I appreciated the warmth of being recognized by the guy who works at the indie sports shop and picking up a gift certificate for a boy who is going to be so appreciative when he opens it.

I appreciated the unexpected delight of being drawn into a shop I'd never been in before.  It was slightly dangerous (to the wallet), but the finds were really fun.

I appreciated my ability to not buy myself a cup of coffee knowing I had good caffeine waiting for me at home.

I appreciated the indie stationery store where, finally, I could buy a roll of wrapping paper.

I appreciated checking everything off my list (and then some).

We did have to cancel common meal tonight (after postponing it on Monday and canceling in November).  This opens up some time, but also means we have a surfeit of awkward foodstuff, again.  Not a biggie.

Also not a biggie, the fact that the above lamp has been non-functional for years...and that, in the end, it was a simple fix.  There was a time, a big chunk of my adult life, when the non-getting done of tasks like this would drive me crazy.  I would feel stupid and hate myself.  Something has really changed.  

When I decluttered last weekend and came across the lamp (there have been many items in my life that I have just tossed because I couldn't deal with the logistics of fixing them...but this lamp is special in many ways and so I've held onto it), my mind had been decluttered enough in the last year that I knew what I could do to try to fix it.

I wrapped the old cord with a rubber band so I could bring it to the hardware store with me.  Put this bundle on the (now decluttered) shoe shelf by the door where I only place high use items (keys) or things that are going "out" (library books to return, mail to send, etc.)  Within a week, I was in the hardware store showing the guy my bundle and in two minutes I had a replacement cord.  That cost $5.

Once I got home, I was excited to see if it would work.  And, of course, it did.  And I only felt happy.

You know what else makes me happy?

Baxter is with us a for a few days.  He's been asleep much of the morning, but just wandered over to the Christmas tree and sniffed at the presents under there.  Now he's curled onto a corner of the Christmas cloth that covers the tree stand.  Sweet.

The cards are not finished and I do have a couple of pounds of pecans to candy.  Plans continue to be made, for Christmas Eve and then our time in MA right after Christmas.  It's all good, actually, it's all wonderful, but a part of me is also looking forward to the very end of the year, a few days with absolutely no obligations.  Of quiet.

Peace.