Wednesday, despite it being the dreaded day 2 of my period, was a breeze. I cooked and cleaned all day and we had a lovely and delicious common meal.
Thursday I crashed. I was super tired (what used to be normal) and couldn't stop eating the leftover chocolate rice crispy treats.
Friday morning I slept in...a sign of recovery. I was on the outer edge of grumpy. I was grateful for the chance to gaze at art with my honey. I was somewhat productive at home.
And now, it's Saturday. Time to push. And finish. I'm a great starter, still figuring out this finishing thing. I have cooking (short ribs; beef sliders), packing (and more packing) and lots of cleaning (would love for our mouse friends to not be tempted to come and party while we're gone) on deck.
Saturday, August 11, 2012
Friday, August 10, 2012
Friday fun
Cap and I were able to get to the Newark Museum to see the Romare Bearden exhibit today. It's only there till a week from Sunday. It was a wonderful exhibit full of interesting works. No photography was allowed in that gallery. (This non-Bearden metal peacock sculpture caught my eye and I was allowed to snap some pics of that.)
Here are some images pulled off the web of pieces I enjoyed. The first one was my favorite (it was not as bright as this in real life).
The museum gift shop was amazing. I found my mom a great belated birthday present and she is extremely hard to shop for. I also found a wonderful apartment warming gift for a friend who is moving into her own place after 20+ years of marriage. I even found something I loved, for myself, but couldn't justify the price tag (a pendant made by a local artisan).
Before picking the kids up from their playdate, we swung by the library and picked up some books on cd for the upcoming road trip. The black one on the end is The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe.
Then we hit the bookshop where they were already sold out of the latest Origami Yoda book, The Secret of the Fortune Wookie. We picked up the above, instead.
The kids have been making cards, cards and more cards lately. Two birthdays were celebrated last weekend in MA, tomorrow they celebrate a friend's birthday, and in VA we will be celebrating my mom's bday and my parents' 50th anniversary.
I have been chugging kombucha nearly every day. When I am not eating "cleanly", it really soothes me. Yesterday was my first problem day since ending the Whole 30 and reintroducing sugar, dairy and grains in bits and pieces to my food repertoire. I could not stop eating the chocolate rice crispy treats. They were like crack. The high sugar hits were bad, but I think what was worse was that I wasn't hungry in between and therefore didn't eat much of anything else the rest of the day. I forced myself to stop eating them late in the afternoon and then had a big comforting serving of cold sesame noodles from our local Chinese takeout for dinner.
Then, I slept for ten hours! (After finishing The Age of Miracles which I did not enjoy very much.)
Laundry, laundry, laundry. Tonight I will be folding, folding, folding and packing, packing, packing.
Very excited for Sag that Ribbon is finally on. He loves it so much, it is incredibly visual which is up his alley. He really wants to learn how to do this. He made his own ribbon a couple of weeks ago, but wants a longer/bigger one. He has been so inspired by many events. He wants to take a gymnastics class this Fall.
Peace and love.
Thursday, August 09, 2012
Yum
I have been wanting to make these since the recipe came across my virtual desk a few weeks ago. Four ingredients, of which three are regular pantry ingredients? Preparation time of 15 minutes or so (plus time to sit in the fridge to cool)? Covering something in chocolate?
Yes, please.
I served this up as dessert at common meal last night. It was a big hit for kids and grown ups alike. Gem, our GFCF kid, felt there was too much chocolate on his. I don't think that will ever be something that computes as a problem for me.
Now that my day of cooking and cleaning is behind me, I am glancing at the behemoth that is preparing to go away for a week.
I will be interspersing the making of lists and checking things off one by one the next few days with finishing this and going to this. And breathing deeply. And practicing.
Peace and love.
Tuesday, August 07, 2012
mass fun in Mass
We zipped up to the Motherland for a long weekend. It was a very fun and full three days. A great visit. I didn't take photos for swaths of time so don't have a good cross section of visuals.
Saturday morning we drove straight to Kingston and visited with Olivia, Will and Karen. The time was incredibly short, unfortunately. We then dropped the kids off with Amy and hightailed it into JP. We met friends (including Ebs and Eleanor) for a delicious Indian dinner. Then it was onto the Pavilion for a Josh Ritter and Brandi Carlile double bill. Josh Ritter was on my musical bucket list and, boy, he did not disappoint. The dude had a smile on his face mile-wide all night. He was *so* happy and into it. Brandi Carlile was solid. She's got a lot of charisma and was really cool. We left her set early because it was getting late and I had a feeling Gem would be waiting up for us. Oh, and, this was the first concert I've ever been to where I eschewed a decent selection of concert t-shirts for an autographed concert book.
Sunday morning Mummu came over for coffee and a visit. We dropped her off back home (where I gasped at her gorgeous hydrangeas) and headed out to Fenway for a day game. The game was the best we've been to yet. It was plenty hot and fairly muggy, but there was a semi-regular breeze blowing and we were under the upper deck. The first few innings were a pitcher's duel, but then the Sox started getting hits including a homerun by my current favorite player, Adrian Gonalez. We were psyched to try the gluten-free Fenway Franks and thrilled to find them delicious! (Will Cap and I ever get used to the sight of Gem eating something new-to-him-because-there-is-a-gluten-free-version? Seeing him eat something as iconic and typical as a Fenway Frank made our hearts sing.) After six innings in terrific seats, we made our way out of the park snapping a few pics. It was a great afternoon.
After the game we made our way back to base camp where cousins and auntie and Jamie were waiting. We enjoyed a quintessential summer meal al fresco on the new patio which I kind of can't believe I didn't photograph. It was amazing.
Monday morning the kids stayed home with their cousins and Jay (who had been toiling at the hospital all weekend) and Cap and I took Mummu out to run errands. It was productive and fun. Jay and the kids met us for lunch where there was much oohing and aahing of synchronized swimming as we munched on Chinese and Japanese fare. Afterward, Cap took the kidlets to the comic book store and Jay and I foraged for dinner (lobster and scallops). After another dinner on the patio, we packed up and headed home. The kids discovered the center arm rest with a pillow on top makes for happy resting.
Saturday morning we drove straight to Kingston and visited with Olivia, Will and Karen. The time was incredibly short, unfortunately. We then dropped the kids off with Amy and hightailed it into JP. We met friends (including Ebs and Eleanor) for a delicious Indian dinner. Then it was onto the Pavilion for a Josh Ritter and Brandi Carlile double bill. Josh Ritter was on my musical bucket list and, boy, he did not disappoint. The dude had a smile on his face mile-wide all night. He was *so* happy and into it. Brandi Carlile was solid. She's got a lot of charisma and was really cool. We left her set early because it was getting late and I had a feeling Gem would be waiting up for us. Oh, and, this was the first concert I've ever been to where I eschewed a decent selection of concert t-shirts for an autographed concert book.
Sunday morning Mummu came over for coffee and a visit. We dropped her off back home (where I gasped at her gorgeous hydrangeas) and headed out to Fenway for a day game. The game was the best we've been to yet. It was plenty hot and fairly muggy, but there was a semi-regular breeze blowing and we were under the upper deck. The first few innings were a pitcher's duel, but then the Sox started getting hits including a homerun by my current favorite player, Adrian Gonalez. We were psyched to try the gluten-free Fenway Franks and thrilled to find them delicious! (Will Cap and I ever get used to the sight of Gem eating something new-to-him-because-there-is-a-gluten-free-version? Seeing him eat something as iconic and typical as a Fenway Frank made our hearts sing.) After six innings in terrific seats, we made our way out of the park snapping a few pics. It was a great afternoon.
After the game we made our way back to base camp where cousins and auntie and Jamie were waiting. We enjoyed a quintessential summer meal al fresco on the new patio which I kind of can't believe I didn't photograph. It was amazing.
Monday morning the kids stayed home with their cousins and Jay (who had been toiling at the hospital all weekend) and Cap and I took Mummu out to run errands. It was productive and fun. Jay and the kids met us for lunch where there was much oohing and aahing of synchronized swimming as we munched on Chinese and Japanese fare. Afterward, Cap took the kidlets to the comic book store and Jay and I foraged for dinner (lobster and scallops). After another dinner on the patio, we packed up and headed home. The kids discovered the center arm rest with a pillow on top makes for happy resting.
Peace and love.
Friday, August 03, 2012
The age of miracles
This shot looked so perfect on my phone yesterday, I was bummed Sag's hand is cut off there at the top. You can see the kid has been watching some Olympics :-)
My energy and mood continue to hold up. I have not had the wherewithal to take the kids to the pool in a few summers, no less the first half of this one. (And this, despite buying passes year after year.) As I sat watching them, feeling the late afternoon August warm seeping into my skin, I could feel something had shifted.
I was grateful.
Not surprisingly, with more energy comes more getting to things that have been waiting-in-the-wings. And this means less sitting in my chair reading and writing (or blogging, more accurately).
I did start a new book yesterday (it's a new one and cannot be renewed) and, get this, a few pages in, I felt the urge to practice Qigong. I felt a bit stiff, put the book down, got up and practiced. I felt better, sat back down and resumed reading.
These things seem both small and big.
Peace.
Wednesday, August 01, 2012
Addendum
And, my mosquito bites are SO itchy now. Systemic inflammation brought on by gluten, no doubt.
Overload
I've been eating very small amounts of gluten here and there since coming off of Whole30 (which a slew of folks started today, including Shannon!)
After my session with Vinny this afternoon (neck and shoulders very tight again, but he was excited about my sleep change and upbeat mood), I took the kids to the comic book store since Cap is pulling a late-nighter getting the editing done for camp. This is exactly the kind of thing I haven't had the energy for this summer. But, today, I was completely up for it.
As we were driving home, I realized we'd be driving right by The Pie Store. I had dinner set for the kids and Cap wasn't going to be home for dinner. If I had given my brain a moment to breathe, I would have thought: I have leftover braised cabbage...liverwurst...eggs...a beautiful head of lettuce from the farm. But, something in my mind started dancing. I wanted a savory pasty.
I picked up two sweet potato and blue cheese and onion pasties. One for my upstairs neighbor, who loves them, and one for me. He was so pleased, his joy was totally worth it.
And for me? Now I know. A pasty is way too much of a gluten hit. My mind feels woozy, my head heavy. My stomach is so bloated. Blech.
Now I know.
: : : : : :
Earlier today I thought: I could stop watching the Olympics and my world would not end. The novelty has definitely lost some of its luster. In no small part because of frakkin' NBC and their heavy-handed grubby coverage. In this age of internet streaming, something has to shift.
I think the two events Sag is really looking forward to start soon: trampoline and rhythmic gymnastics. I will check the listings for those and record...but otherwise, I have 3/4 of a mind to watch last week's Burn Notice or start my "new" and therefore non-renewable library book.
: : : : : :
Our new-to-us reconditioned Vitamix was either delivered to the wrong porch or lifted off of ours (within the short span of ten to fifteen minutes). UPS said take it up with Vitamix, but it was too late to call them once I realized the package was AWOL. I have no idea what will happen. Will it show up tomorrow or in the next few days? Will Vitamix send another one? Will we simply be out a few hundred dollars? (Yep, they are that expensive.) Not the way I wanted my long and patient journey to a Vitamix to come to an end. Fingers crossed.
: : : : : :
Peace and love.
After my session with Vinny this afternoon (neck and shoulders very tight again, but he was excited about my sleep change and upbeat mood), I took the kids to the comic book store since Cap is pulling a late-nighter getting the editing done for camp. This is exactly the kind of thing I haven't had the energy for this summer. But, today, I was completely up for it.
As we were driving home, I realized we'd be driving right by The Pie Store. I had dinner set for the kids and Cap wasn't going to be home for dinner. If I had given my brain a moment to breathe, I would have thought: I have leftover braised cabbage...liverwurst...eggs...a beautiful head of lettuce from the farm. But, something in my mind started dancing. I wanted a savory pasty.
I picked up two sweet potato and blue cheese and onion pasties. One for my upstairs neighbor, who loves them, and one for me. He was so pleased, his joy was totally worth it.
And for me? Now I know. A pasty is way too much of a gluten hit. My mind feels woozy, my head heavy. My stomach is so bloated. Blech.
Now I know.
: : : : : :
Earlier today I thought: I could stop watching the Olympics and my world would not end. The novelty has definitely lost some of its luster. In no small part because of frakkin' NBC and their heavy-handed grubby coverage. In this age of internet streaming, something has to shift.
I think the two events Sag is really looking forward to start soon: trampoline and rhythmic gymnastics. I will check the listings for those and record...but otherwise, I have 3/4 of a mind to watch last week's Burn Notice or start my "new" and therefore non-renewable library book.
: : : : : :
Our new-to-us reconditioned Vitamix was either delivered to the wrong porch or lifted off of ours (within the short span of ten to fifteen minutes). UPS said take it up with Vitamix, but it was too late to call them once I realized the package was AWOL. I have no idea what will happen. Will it show up tomorrow or in the next few days? Will Vitamix send another one? Will we simply be out a few hundred dollars? (Yep, they are that expensive.) Not the way I wanted my long and patient journey to a Vitamix to come to an end. Fingers crossed.
: : : : : :
Peace and love.
O sleep
Each of the last few days has been revelatory in the new pockets of energy experienced. With the energy has come more smiles, more laughter and more peace.
Last night, though...a sleep setback.
The post-common meal hungries were particularly strong (the kids and Cap often need a second dinner because they didn't get too distracted playing and not liking the food). I enjoyed a dinner plate of salad with roasted chicken and feta cheese and a piece of watermelon for dessert, but in this post-ovulation second half of my cycle...I was hungry again a few hours later.
10pm last night I was chatting in the kitchen with Cap while he made me a signature, masterful, grilled cheese sandwich (Udi's white sandwich bread buttered with Kerrygold sprinkled with garlic powder on one side...my cheese last night was smoked gouda). And then I stayed up till midnight watching the Olympics.
I fell asleep pretty quickly and went into dream sleep again. Can I digress? I had noticed...for at least the past few years...that I was no longer remembering my dreams. It never occurred to me, I don't know why, that I wasn't remembering because I wasn't having them. Since the weekend, I have been waking up remembering my lengthy and cinematic dreams. They've had lots of narrative and suspenseful tension. It has been a homecoming of sorts and I've come to feel that I am sleeping not only longer, but more deeply for a longer stretch of the night, thanks to the herbs.
Sleep deprivation is an insidious and bad thing for well-being. My eyes have been opened (no pun intended...but I like it) to how significant an obstacle it had become in my own path of healing. I see Vinny again today. I'm glad to have some observations to report and wonder what he'll say.
This morning, I was roused from dream-sleep by the clattering clamor of a powerful downpour on the metal box in the bedroom window that has kept me sane this persistently hot and/or humid summer. A disharmonic convergence. My eyes couldn't unsee the daylight, my stomach couldn't unfeel the late night sandwich deposit, my mind couldn't unwake the abrupt transition from my olympic dream.
Less than six hours of sleep. And a rain system pressed down on us for the duration of the day. I feel tired...but not as tired as I felt when I first got out of bed nearly two hours ago. I feel happy...I feel the energy of possibility. And that? Pretty wonderful.
Last night, though...a sleep setback.
The post-common meal hungries were particularly strong (the kids and Cap often need a second dinner because they didn't get too distracted playing and not liking the food). I enjoyed a dinner plate of salad with roasted chicken and feta cheese and a piece of watermelon for dessert, but in this post-ovulation second half of my cycle...I was hungry again a few hours later.
10pm last night I was chatting in the kitchen with Cap while he made me a signature, masterful, grilled cheese sandwich (Udi's white sandwich bread buttered with Kerrygold sprinkled with garlic powder on one side...my cheese last night was smoked gouda). And then I stayed up till midnight watching the Olympics.
I fell asleep pretty quickly and went into dream sleep again. Can I digress? I had noticed...for at least the past few years...that I was no longer remembering my dreams. It never occurred to me, I don't know why, that I wasn't remembering because I wasn't having them. Since the weekend, I have been waking up remembering my lengthy and cinematic dreams. They've had lots of narrative and suspenseful tension. It has been a homecoming of sorts and I've come to feel that I am sleeping not only longer, but more deeply for a longer stretch of the night, thanks to the herbs.
Sleep deprivation is an insidious and bad thing for well-being. My eyes have been opened (no pun intended...but I like it) to how significant an obstacle it had become in my own path of healing. I see Vinny again today. I'm glad to have some observations to report and wonder what he'll say.
This morning, I was roused from dream-sleep by the clattering clamor of a powerful downpour on the metal box in the bedroom window that has kept me sane this persistently hot and/or humid summer. A disharmonic convergence. My eyes couldn't unsee the daylight, my stomach couldn't unfeel the late night sandwich deposit, my mind couldn't unwake the abrupt transition from my olympic dream.
Less than six hours of sleep. And a rain system pressed down on us for the duration of the day. I feel tired...but not as tired as I felt when I first got out of bed nearly two hours ago. I feel happy...I feel the energy of possibility. And that? Pretty wonderful.
Monday, July 30, 2012
Jottings
• sleep is shifting thanks to the Chinese herbal sleep aid. (not surprised) it hasn't slipped right into smooth sailing. one night an epic cinematic suspenseful dream. one night hot flash mid-sleep awakening followed by a too cold/have-to-pee mid-sleep awakening the next night. (same climate control both nights.) Olympic fever has made it hard to go to bed earlier, but I am definitely sleeping later and getting closer to eight hours a night. also falling asleep quicker with much less mental thought spiraling. I can literally feel the sleep deprivation-crazy ebbing from my system. (a crazy I tend not to feel until it's way too late, or, I am in recovery/repair mode.)
• eating some non-Paleo and/or junky food: brown rice wraps, cheese, potato chips, ice cream, dark chocolate, yogurt, corn tortillas, coconut cream pie, Thai iced coffee... it has been mostly very enjoyable. the potato chips went into minus balance zone almost right away (yet I went for a second go around a couple of days later...cycle related salt/fat craving, methinks). noticed quite distinctly that last night's Rita's "twist" of vanilla and chocolate frozen custard did not fill me substantially in any way. I needed to eat shortly afterward to get some protein. meal planned yesterday to eat Paleo this week. we have a weekend away coming up and next weekend we go on holiday for a week in VA.
• experienced a definite mood drop this morning (after days dotted with bright energy). spurred me to fill in smiley-neutral-sad faces in my calendar. (Donna's idea...thank you to all my friends and supporters who have tossed ideas my way in the wake of this "d-word" crisis.) I think this is a post-ovulation drop. it helped to do something concrete, outside of my head, to deal with feeling emotionally down. it also occurred to me to call someone and make a date today. it definitely helps to be in the company of friends when feeling this way.
• but first, because I had meal planned a light breakfast for myself (Dragon's Way style nuts and fruit), once I unloaded the dishwasher and washed up/loaded the stuff in the sink and made breakfast for the kids (and rejoiced that Cap had organized a messy corner of the kitchen and ignored the bordering-on-filthy kitchen floor), I grabbed my homemade iced coffee and bowl of cantaloupe and practiced Qigong in the front room. the shifts in sleep, food and routine triangulated, finally, so I could practice in the morning as I am wont to do. (eventually I am hoping to practice first thing in the morning, early enough so the kids are still asleep.)
• beginning to plan for MA and VA. want to make more headway in figuring out the exercise thing before we go away.
• am loving the inspiration of watching the Olympics: archery, volleyball, dressage, weightlifting...so many sports I know little to nothing about that I want to try now!
• eating some non-Paleo and/or junky food: brown rice wraps, cheese, potato chips, ice cream, dark chocolate, yogurt, corn tortillas, coconut cream pie, Thai iced coffee... it has been mostly very enjoyable. the potato chips went into minus balance zone almost right away (yet I went for a second go around a couple of days later...cycle related salt/fat craving, methinks). noticed quite distinctly that last night's Rita's "twist" of vanilla and chocolate frozen custard did not fill me substantially in any way. I needed to eat shortly afterward to get some protein. meal planned yesterday to eat Paleo this week. we have a weekend away coming up and next weekend we go on holiday for a week in VA.
• experienced a definite mood drop this morning (after days dotted with bright energy). spurred me to fill in smiley-neutral-sad faces in my calendar. (Donna's idea...thank you to all my friends and supporters who have tossed ideas my way in the wake of this "d-word" crisis.) I think this is a post-ovulation drop. it helped to do something concrete, outside of my head, to deal with feeling emotionally down. it also occurred to me to call someone and make a date today. it definitely helps to be in the company of friends when feeling this way.
• but first, because I had meal planned a light breakfast for myself (Dragon's Way style nuts and fruit), once I unloaded the dishwasher and washed up/loaded the stuff in the sink and made breakfast for the kids (and rejoiced that Cap had organized a messy corner of the kitchen and ignored the bordering-on-filthy kitchen floor), I grabbed my homemade iced coffee and bowl of cantaloupe and practiced Qigong in the front room. the shifts in sleep, food and routine triangulated, finally, so I could practice in the morning as I am wont to do. (eventually I am hoping to practice first thing in the morning, early enough so the kids are still asleep.)
• beginning to plan for MA and VA. want to make more headway in figuring out the exercise thing before we go away.
• am loving the inspiration of watching the Olympics: archery, volleyball, dressage, weightlifting...so many sports I know little to nothing about that I want to try now!
Saturday, July 28, 2012
Olympic fever
Sorry for the absence. Things are bubbling and shifting. Last week's unexpected crisis (the "depression" dx) has proven to be a positive opportunity for change. It was a linchpin.
It opened me up in the way reckonings do.
So I have been talking and writing and thinking and doing...off blog. Not on purpose, it's just how it has happened. I am lucky, things have been good.
The weather's been getting me down energetically. It's my alpha, I have no say. Books have been picking up the slack and keeping in balance. I finished Freedom which was devastatingly good and read Born Round in about 24 hours. It was a stunning read. Swaths of the memoir read as if Frank Bruni was actually me. Not the exotic journalistic travels and being a NYT restaurant critic parts...but the whole internal workings of a being born with a powerful appetite for food thing? Wow. Very connective.
Now I am in the throes of Olympic fever. It is so much fun for all of us, but especially me. Already today we've watched cycling, swimming, archery, fencing, table tennis, soccer, tennis and basketball. And it's barely noon!
Peace and love.
It opened me up in the way reckonings do.
So I have been talking and writing and thinking and doing...off blog. Not on purpose, it's just how it has happened. I am lucky, things have been good.
The weather's been getting me down energetically. It's my alpha, I have no say. Books have been picking up the slack and keeping in balance. I finished Freedom which was devastatingly good and read Born Round in about 24 hours. It was a stunning read. Swaths of the memoir read as if Frank Bruni was actually me. Not the exotic journalistic travels and being a NYT restaurant critic parts...but the whole internal workings of a being born with a powerful appetite for food thing? Wow. Very connective.
Now I am in the throes of Olympic fever. It is so much fun for all of us, but especially me. Already today we've watched cycling, swimming, archery, fencing, table tennis, soccer, tennis and basketball. And it's barely noon!
Peace and love.
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Foody
I have 13 minutes left in my hour break...I was so productive in the kitchen this morning, and the kids cleaned the bathroom...but there is still more to do before common meal tonight.
Last night's dinner. I have thoroughly been enjoying quesadillas with brown rice wraps. This one had the last of the garlic scape pesto in it. So so yummy. I am ready to go back to no sugar after a few nights of ice cream. And just about ready to go back to no grains. Thinking on the no dairy...
Purple basil. So very pretty. I love the color combination of purple and green. This basil, from the farm, was incredibly fragrant.
I cleaned out the fridge and found quite a bit of salad turnips in there. The tails had fuzzy white mold on them. Washed, peeled and sliced. Pickled in a ziplock with salt. So very easy.
Sautéed summer squash with an onion (all from the farm). Used ghee and Penzey's Tuscan Sunset and a bit of salt.
Made two pitchers of iced tea: Raspberry Earl and Ambrosia Plum.
That purple and green thing I was telling you about. Love love love it. Fresh and tender lettuce is high on my list of reasons to be part of a CSA or get your produce from the farmer's market.
Pesto made with purple and green basil. Garlic, toasted pine nuts, salt and olive oil.
Put together a meat sauce for the kids with pastured ground sirloin, olive oil, granulated garlic, onion flakes and a jar of Amy's family marinara. Gem likes his on rice, Sag prefers pizza toast. The cherry toms are from Muth Farm and available at Terra. They are amazing.
Last night's dinner. I have thoroughly been enjoying quesadillas with brown rice wraps. This one had the last of the garlic scape pesto in it. So so yummy. I am ready to go back to no sugar after a few nights of ice cream. And just about ready to go back to no grains. Thinking on the no dairy...
Purple basil. So very pretty. I love the color combination of purple and green. This basil, from the farm, was incredibly fragrant.
I cleaned out the fridge and found quite a bit of salad turnips in there. The tails had fuzzy white mold on them. Washed, peeled and sliced. Pickled in a ziplock with salt. So very easy.
Sautéed summer squash with an onion (all from the farm). Used ghee and Penzey's Tuscan Sunset and a bit of salt.
Made two pitchers of iced tea: Raspberry Earl and Ambrosia Plum.
That purple and green thing I was telling you about. Love love love it. Fresh and tender lettuce is high on my list of reasons to be part of a CSA or get your produce from the farmer's market.
Pesto made with purple and green basil. Garlic, toasted pine nuts, salt and olive oil.
Put together a meat sauce for the kids with pastured ground sirloin, olive oil, granulated garlic, onion flakes and a jar of Amy's family marinara. Gem likes his on rice, Sag prefers pizza toast. The cherry toms are from Muth Farm and available at Terra. They are amazing.
Roasted broccoli with Applegate Farm thick-cut bacon (my favorite of what is locally available). I made a big batch for tonight and had some for lunch.
Aaaaand time. (Went over by a few minutes.)
Canaries still chirping (in the mines)
This blogpost by Michael Moore was a valuable read. It's provocative and outlying...backed up by irrefutable statistical evidence. In other words, de rigueur Moore.
There are so many things in our society that just. must. give.
The book I am reading, Freedom, illustrates this, too. It is well written (at times exhilaratingly so) and engaging...but so not feel good.
There are so many things in our society that just. must. give.
The book I am reading, Freedom, illustrates this, too. It is well written (at times exhilaratingly so) and engaging...but so not feel good.
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Shopping
I still haven't constructed an updated budget. Which makes me leery of spending money. But I am doing some shopping anyway to move forward on a few things.
For the car/my honey (our free trial ends tomorrow):
For my kitchen (20% off best price available...it's a steam mop):
For my culinary self (reconditioned, 5 year warranty, made in USA, free shipping):
For the car/my honey (our free trial ends tomorrow):
For my butt body (it's a pedometer):
For my kitchen (20% off best price available...it's a steam mop):
For my culinary self (reconditioned, 5 year warranty, made in USA, free shipping):
Peace.
Monday, July 23, 2012
Monday muse
Thunder in the sky saving me from dragging my reluctant ass to the pool. (The kids want to go and of course I want them to go. But our town pools are very strict about no swimming while there is rumbling, even in the distance.)
I am sipping some delicious iced tea and deep in the throes of processing numerous piles of paperwork.
Listening to my summer playlist which is full of pep, joy, groove...as well as touches of wistfulness.
One of the things I uncovered in my excavation was a slip of paper with two names on it: Cy Twombly and Tacita Dean. I had written their names down while at an exhibit with Barbra last month. This is the nature of my life, having inspiration strike...while reflection is often reserved for a later date. Not that much reflection has happened today. But, now it's in my virtual notebook and I can recycle the slip of paper...
This morning I spent what ended up feeling like an inordinate amount of time researching steam mops. A week ago I didn't even know steam mops were even a thing. In my quest for efficient cleaning I have looked into them. Sadly, they are not a reliable quick fix. Some people have had great experiences/purchases, while others have hated the exact same product/brand. My sad, sticky, soiled kitchen floor awaits a verdict...an action of some sort.
Cap and I saw Friends with Kids and enjoyed it. This song was used to start the movie and I loved it (even though I've heard it before and had not been similarly impressed).
I am sipping some delicious iced tea and deep in the throes of processing numerous piles of paperwork.
Listening to my summer playlist which is full of pep, joy, groove...as well as touches of wistfulness.
One of the things I uncovered in my excavation was a slip of paper with two names on it: Cy Twombly and Tacita Dean. I had written their names down while at an exhibit with Barbra last month. This is the nature of my life, having inspiration strike...while reflection is often reserved for a later date. Not that much reflection has happened today. But, now it's in my virtual notebook and I can recycle the slip of paper...
This morning I spent what ended up feeling like an inordinate amount of time researching steam mops. A week ago I didn't even know steam mops were even a thing. In my quest for efficient cleaning I have looked into them. Sadly, they are not a reliable quick fix. Some people have had great experiences/purchases, while others have hated the exact same product/brand. My sad, sticky, soiled kitchen floor awaits a verdict...an action of some sort.
Cap and I saw Friends with Kids and enjoyed it. This song was used to start the movie and I loved it (even though I've heard it before and had not been similarly impressed).
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Doctor my eyes
Thank you for your kind, caring and thoughtful words and well wishes. Thank you for bearing witness...with curiosity, love and a steady gaze. I am lucky...and honored.
I am feeling, overall, at greater peace with each passing day.
I think it has to do with where I am in my menstrual cycle, I think it also has to do with coming off the Whole30.
I think it is also part and parcel with my process as it unfolds. Whole30 did not bring about the change I thought it might. My labs and meeting with my western doctor did not bring about the change I thought it might.
That sucked...it was a rough spot. But, it actually forced some transformation...it pried open something inside. The stress bubbled up and out.
I alluded a few posts back to how my easy smile shows almost nothing of what's really going on inside, sometimes. I have realized in the past few days how easily I can trick myself into thinking I am "letting something go" when I am actually swallowing it, pushing it down into me.
I am fast moving past my disappointment. Conversations and emails with friends and loved ones have been helping me truly let go of it. Expressing my frustration, anger, confusion...raising my voice, feeling the emotional rush and letting it run a little rampant...it feels good, it is a release. I am grateful.
I am feeling, overall, at greater peace with each passing day.
I think it has to do with where I am in my menstrual cycle, I think it also has to do with coming off the Whole30.
I think it is also part and parcel with my process as it unfolds. Whole30 did not bring about the change I thought it might. My labs and meeting with my western doctor did not bring about the change I thought it might.
That sucked...it was a rough spot. But, it actually forced some transformation...it pried open something inside. The stress bubbled up and out.
I alluded a few posts back to how my easy smile shows almost nothing of what's really going on inside, sometimes. I have realized in the past few days how easily I can trick myself into thinking I am "letting something go" when I am actually swallowing it, pushing it down into me.
I am fast moving past my disappointment. Conversations and emails with friends and loved ones have been helping me truly let go of it. Expressing my frustration, anger, confusion...raising my voice, feeling the emotional rush and letting it run a little rampant...it feels good, it is a release. I am grateful.
Manatee love
I am feeling clearer and happier about my process. I am enjoying non-Whole30 foods. I am reveling in a relaxing Sunday.
Here is a shot of internet awesome. Enjoy!
Here is a shot of internet awesome. Enjoy!
Saturday, July 21, 2012
Some words
Feeling bumbly with written words.
Because since seeing the doctor Thursday afternoon I have been feeling the need to verbalize more in real time.
And, apparently, I can't do both right now.
Which is interesting.
So, bumbling right along...
The short story is that my doctor, a general family practitioner for whom I have a lot of respect, deduced that I am "depressed". I couldn't quite get my head around that. I declined taking medication. She was okay with that. We agreed I would start getting exercise every day (which hasn't happened yet).
There is, of course, a longer rambling story. And rambling + bumbling = awkward. Maybe I'll go with bullets.
• I was upset with the diagnosis. In part because I felt it wasn't an artful one and I expected more from the doc. In part because it made me feel ashamed. In part because it made me realize this process wasn't coming to a simple end. In part because part of me wanted to believe it so I could be done with it.
• My thyroid came back "fine". There are issues with thyroid testing and I don't know much about it. Whether I fall under the category of "needs further testing" or not is something I may never know. I have a friend who just recently received the diagnosis she had suspected as being the correct one (Hashimoto's thyroiditis) after over ten years of doing her own research and pushing myriad doctors to think/perform outside their boxes.
• My white blood cell count was low. The doc said this is sometimes caused by a virus. She noted that it was low two years ago, as well, and then dropped it.
• Note to self: get a copy of the latest lab results so I have my "numbers" at hand.
• My vitamin D was low. Over-the-counter D supplement was recommended (still haven't picked those up).
• She said my cholesterol was high-ish and my diabetes risk was high-ish. And then dropped it. This info was not new, but the realization that these numbers have not moved much despite the diet change was interesting.
• She seemed to feel my results weren't "nothing", but that there was no clear direction to go. So she made her call based on the info she had (which included asking me some questions about my energy level/fatigue, whether I was having "fun", etc.)
• Depression is a symptom of so many other things...in this day and age it is frustrating that a depression diagnosis is an end point rather than a launching pad.
• I am not opposed to treating depression symptoms with anti-depressants. I know these meds have saved countless lives and helped many get past the rut of the symptoms in order to move forward with life more efficiently.
• I just don't believe, at this point in time, that taking the meds would be worth it for me.
• In the hours and days since I met with the doc, I have felt upset, relieved, confused.
• I have spoken to Vinny but won't be seeing him till the end of next week because he is at a conference.
• I have thought about how different the Whole30 experience was for me compared to going grain-free and sugar-free last August. Namely, that not only did I not feel great, but in some ways I felt worse than I did when I started.
• I have been thinking of the Japanese concept of amae and how it may apply to my self-identity.
The boys are downstairs reading on the porch. I am going to get off the computer and practice Qigong. More soon.
Peace and love.
Because since seeing the doctor Thursday afternoon I have been feeling the need to verbalize more in real time.
And, apparently, I can't do both right now.
Which is interesting.
So, bumbling right along...
The short story is that my doctor, a general family practitioner for whom I have a lot of respect, deduced that I am "depressed". I couldn't quite get my head around that. I declined taking medication. She was okay with that. We agreed I would start getting exercise every day (which hasn't happened yet).
There is, of course, a longer rambling story. And rambling + bumbling = awkward. Maybe I'll go with bullets.
• I was upset with the diagnosis. In part because I felt it wasn't an artful one and I expected more from the doc. In part because it made me feel ashamed. In part because it made me realize this process wasn't coming to a simple end. In part because part of me wanted to believe it so I could be done with it.
• My thyroid came back "fine". There are issues with thyroid testing and I don't know much about it. Whether I fall under the category of "needs further testing" or not is something I may never know. I have a friend who just recently received the diagnosis she had suspected as being the correct one (Hashimoto's thyroiditis) after over ten years of doing her own research and pushing myriad doctors to think/perform outside their boxes.
• My white blood cell count was low. The doc said this is sometimes caused by a virus. She noted that it was low two years ago, as well, and then dropped it.
• Note to self: get a copy of the latest lab results so I have my "numbers" at hand.
• My vitamin D was low. Over-the-counter D supplement was recommended (still haven't picked those up).
• She said my cholesterol was high-ish and my diabetes risk was high-ish. And then dropped it. This info was not new, but the realization that these numbers have not moved much despite the diet change was interesting.
• She seemed to feel my results weren't "nothing", but that there was no clear direction to go. So she made her call based on the info she had (which included asking me some questions about my energy level/fatigue, whether I was having "fun", etc.)
• Depression is a symptom of so many other things...in this day and age it is frustrating that a depression diagnosis is an end point rather than a launching pad.
• I am not opposed to treating depression symptoms with anti-depressants. I know these meds have saved countless lives and helped many get past the rut of the symptoms in order to move forward with life more efficiently.
• I just don't believe, at this point in time, that taking the meds would be worth it for me.
• In the hours and days since I met with the doc, I have felt upset, relieved, confused.
• I have spoken to Vinny but won't be seeing him till the end of next week because he is at a conference.
• I have thought about how different the Whole30 experience was for me compared to going grain-free and sugar-free last August. Namely, that not only did I not feel great, but in some ways I felt worse than I did when I started.
• I have been thinking of the Japanese concept of amae and how it may apply to my self-identity.
The boys are downstairs reading on the porch. I am going to get off the computer and practice Qigong. More soon.
Peace and love.
Thursday, July 19, 2012
More data
I weighed myself this morning. 156. Not the stunning rate of weight loss of August-September '11 when I cut refined sugar and grains from my diet. Back then I dropped 15 lbs. in a month or so, something pretty outrageous. This time it was 8 lbs. in 30 days.
This afternoon I meet with my doctor. I am so curious about what my blood work showed!
Here are my before and after Whole30 shots.
This afternoon I meet with my doctor. I am so curious about what my blood work showed!
Here are my before and after Whole30 shots.
Definitely less chubby/puffy. You know what's scary? How unstrong and unhappy I feel contrary to how I am posing/looking in these photos.
Wednesday, July 18, 2012
Today's internet gems
The day started off with lovely photos of the sky/landscape, taken from various spots around the world.
Then Lana posted a piece about lefties to Facebook. Gem is left-handed and I appreciated this reminder of what it's like for lefties in our right-handed world.
A couple of hours ago, we were hit with some torrential rains. The university lost power (unfortunately for Cap who had planned an evening of video editing tonight with his teachers). Turned out we were on the edge of an incredible storm system which moved right over Manhattan (we're about 14 miles from the city as the crow flies). Click that link for an incredible photo.
Finally, Lego + The Wire. 'Nuff said.
Peace.
Then Lana posted a piece about lefties to Facebook. Gem is left-handed and I appreciated this reminder of what it's like for lefties in our right-handed world.
A couple of hours ago, we were hit with some torrential rains. The university lost power (unfortunately for Cap who had planned an evening of video editing tonight with his teachers). Turned out we were on the edge of an incredible storm system which moved right over Manhattan (we're about 14 miles from the city as the crow flies). Click that link for an incredible photo.
Finally, Lego + The Wire. 'Nuff said.
Peace.
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