Update

A pic of Sag in the world of Minecraft.  This game, still in beta, is the kids' latest obsession passion.

In other news, I made a green salad and a salad caprese (all ingredients bought in the morning at the farmer's market...we stopped to gaze at the queen bee at the honey stand, Sag got a glazed blueberry donut at Vacchiano Farms and Gem got some lemonade at The Bread Company) and Cap baked chocolate chip cookies and peanut butter cookies, and we broke bread with Danielle, Norb and their kids last night.

It was leisurely and lovely.  Danielle and Norb make quite the culinary team.  My favorite bite of the night was a curry-cranberry-carrot turkey burger of Danielle's own design grilled to perfection by Norb.  I've known Danielle since nursery school, I met Norb sophomore year of college on a visit out to Michigan where they went to school and met.  They met Cap for the first time...probably at their wedding, nearly twenty years ago, in D.C.

Now we've got a gaggle of boys between us and though times like last night are too rare, we are bonded by years and years of connection and true affection...and the incredible luck that plunked us down, of all places in the universe, within two blocks of each other in the Garden State.

In other news, we've been watching Little League on the telly.  Paramus, representing our current and fair state, plays today in the mid-Atlantic finals.  Their evening game was pushed up due to weather.  It has been raining steadily here since 2am, hopefully, they'll be able to play their game today safely (in CT).  The Little League World Series starts next week.

In other news, I started reading Women, Food and God, an interesting read.  Some things she talks about have resonated quite strongly with me, but there's something about her writing style that is clunky (is it her or her editor or both?)  I've had to re-read numerous sentences in order to understand what she was saying.  There is a distinct lack of organizational flow in the first part of the book which outlines, essentially, the "why".

I thought I was going to plunge into the second part of her book, the "hows", but another book has come in from the library, A.D. New Orleans After The Deluge, and I can feel my attention going that way...

In other news, my essentially grain-free, sugar-free eating continues.  I am having the occasional craving which seems quite connected to PMS-y hormonal surges/dips.  I've noticed that in non-home eating situations I am eating more than when I am at home.  And that, though, full (and gently poking myself to try to remember this feeling for the next time), I am not going into the spacey/foggy/lethargic food comas that had become so commonplace for me.

I find it very interesting that, like clockwork, I am no longer "hungry" for something to eat at 9:30/10:00pm in front of the tv.  Not surprisingly, more often than not, I am hungry within an hour of waking up in the morning.  (It really helps to feel physical hunger again, to discriminate between actual hunger and hunger of the psyche/soul.)

Yesterday, for the first time since I began, I felt good.  The balance has tipped so that I feel less achey, less tired, less irritable.  I have been tempted to ease grains and sugar back in, but have decided, for now, to wait until I have the next order of detox in place (the fourth one, practicing Qigong is not fully in force yet, either...): begin regular exercise.

I've decided to join the Y and just do it.  But, I can feel the resistance inside me.  The plan, now, is to join in September, after our week in Massachusetts and their week of sprucing up shut down.  I am going to try walking, swimming, the elliptical and zumba.  The climate control is critical.  But, but, but, but...I feel a strong anxiety about it, too.  A claustrophobic germophobic kind of thing.  Sigh.

For now, I will simply start walking.  Around the block, in the neighborhood, in the park.  Perhaps after a few weeks of walking I will feel ready to incorporate other ways to move my body into my habits.  Perhaps I will no longer feel the need to do anything else.

This morning, I had some matchsticks of Oktoberkase (Valley Shepherd Creamery at the farmer's market) and cherry tomatoes from our farm share.  I've been savoring the tomatoes this season.  They have been delectable.  And they pair so well with cheese!  And tender leaves of lettuce.  I have not missed the bread at all.  Though I marvel at the convenience of pre-made, pre-sliced store-bought bread with new awareness every time I toast some for the boys...

Slowing down and simplifying...at times I can feel the strain on the seemingly hard-wired parts of my brain.  I can understand how bringing meditation into the picture could ease this strain.  Sleep is the best meditation...and for me, the next best thing, my dreaded Dragon Standing Between Heaven and Earth, needs to come next.

Peace and love to you.