Last night I went to bed late-ish (Sunday night is chock full o'tv) and freaked out. I heard very clear scritch scratching in two rooms at different points of the evening. and the critter sounded bigger than a field mouse. fine now. talked to Donna and am pretty confident now it was a squirrel in the wall.
Today's stream:
• Skyped with Cap in the morning and at night. (he arrived safe and sound and even got about six hours of sleep his first night.)
• inspired by his grandmother's impending trip to Carcassonne, Sag pulled out our Carcassonne and he and I had a blast playing.
• blew Gem's mind playing Mastermind. guessed his code in four tries. four times in a row.
• ate much food for comfort...a day of near solid rain and a separation from your beloved will do that. not to mention general sleep deprivation and a period.
• enjoyed Digital Estate Planning with the kids. a very awesome episode of Community. the canning of the show's creator not a good sign for the future of the show. season one was bumpy, but there are moments of sheer brilliance in seasons two and three.
A year ago I was in the midst of Barcelona, Barcelona, Barcelona, Barcelona, Barcelona, Barcelona. I've been thinking of it a lot, but not truly reflecting...yet. In the meantime, this piece came across my Facebook desk and it was doubly fascinating as it reminded me of some of what I saw and experienced in Barcelona pertaining to the Jewish history of the city. Sniff...looking at these photos has made me a bit melancholy.
Today, the kids and I bid adieu to Cap, an early morning drop-off at EWR. On our way home, Sag remarked how awesome it was to be up so early and was all excited about how much he was going to get done today.
Some of the errands that had us bustin' about before Cap's trip were connected to fast approaching Summer.
Pool passes for the summer have been purchased. The kids' Crocs no longer fit so we went to L.L. Bean to check out their flip flops. They were as comfortable as they looked online and Gem and I each got a pair. Sag opted for sandals much like the ones he had when we moved here from Sacramento. It's official: the three of us now have the same size feet!
You might think I'm crazy...but I am patting myself on the back. It occurred to me that we could have a heatwave while Cap is in Japan. So I asked him to put two air conditioners back in for the season. Hot humid weather brings me down. I won't stand for it if I don't have to.
I haven't been too crazy. A touch PMS-y here and there. And even that hasn't been as bad as I thought it was going to be when I bumped up against what I thought was the tip of a ginormous iceberg last weekend.
The list is divided into household chore items for Cap (separate from the numerous details he needs to attend to for himself before he leaves) and my own set of "to do"s. I have a boatload an ocean liner's worth of "to do"s to follow. Ad nauseum infinitum.
Sunday morning is the page break. We are beginning to feel the pangs of impending separation. For now, we dododo and keep it going.
Past the pollen sending frissons of fever through us.
Past the death of a high school classmate.
Past the growing piles of less pressing work to be done.
Past the comeback of Pokemon card gaming in our midst.
Past the precarious purchases that keep our engine of four running smoothly.
Past the clearly positive signs of no gluten for Sag.
Past the indicators at every turn of a maturing Gem who turns 12 in less than a month.
Past a compact, but no less lovely for it, date night.
This is a Siberian cat. 75% of cat allergy sufferers do not react to this breed of cat. I am beginning to research cats, as in, might there be a cat out there for us? Gem's interest in cats, and having one, have not only not waned in the last year, but his passion has been contagious. Sag is now interested in having a kitty of our own and I, a dog person through and through, am thinking it might be very nice to have a feline join our brood. Gem and I are both allergic so the search is on for a "hypoallergenic" kitty. It turns out, what causes the allergic reaction is an enzyme in the saliva. The Siberian, and a few other breeds, produce significantly less of this particular enzyme. I love the look of this kitty. Purr.
I saw my kickass healer yesterday for some laying on of the hands. To answer his query of how are you? I replied stressed...but not unhappy.
I am grateful for the joy I feel despite the obstacles of overwhelmed which blot out swaths of my mental landscape every day these days.
I keep moving forward, latch onto one thing to do and do it, get distracted, then find some other one thing to do and do that. Then I get tired.
The stress --> eating crappily (for comfort, for convenience, without mindfulness) --> plummeting energy --> not practicing Qigong --> more plummeting energy --> watching a lot of tv (for comfort, without much mindfulness) --> sleep deprivation --> more plummeting energy --> all adding more stress. The cycle is in full force.
But, unlike years past, I am not unhappy. I break out of the cycle for bracing moments of clarity that are restorative enough to keep me from getting depressed.
I am loved.
I have good friends.
I have a wonderful family.
I have good ideas/think good thoughts.
I love and care.
Some visuals...
Puppies are super cute. And hot like a hot water bottle! She was so so sweet. I get to puppysit her for awhile this afternoon. Lucky me!
After about a week of being microwave-free, we decided to get a toaster oven. We had nearly $20 in rewards "cash" from Sears and picked up this nifty convection toaster oven for under $100 (it was on sale). Gem declared this morning's reheated turkey meatloaf perfect. Joy. It's the little things.
As Cap's days-before-departure dwindle fast, it's becoming more apparent that my belated Mother's Day Paleo meal may not be happening. Which I am absolutely okay with. I have been enjoying Melissa's Paleo blog and decided this afternoon to give myself (another) Mother's Day treat. I ordered her cookbook and look forward to making some yummy Paleo dishes.
I LOVE OUR NEW CAR!!! Love, love, love, love. It is so comfortable (my bottom is spoiled for leather seats with power lumbar support forever now...and I so look forward to flipping on the seat warmer switch come winter!) ...and watching the mileage monitor creep up and over 45 miles per gallon cruising along endless I-95? Enthralling.
We spent just shy of 24 hours in Plympton and it was wonderful. Jamie came over for the lovely backyard dinner Amy put together. It was so relaxing and the night was perfect for it. Cool enough to keep skeeters away but comfortable enough to play and play and play.
Though I can say no toads were harmed in the making of these photos...it was pretty traumatized-stunned, the poor thing.
Mother's Day was spent celebrating Cap's mom, Mummu to the four "grands" as she calls them. I was very pleased that she seemed to really like our gift, a Barnes and Noble Nook. We set it to charge right away, but didn't have enough time to go over the ins and outs with her. We will be calling upon her local techie gurus for help with that.
And what would a visit with the Plympton cousins be without a viewing of Panda Go Panda? Sorely lacking in tradition, that's what.
Sigh. Cap and I really miss Massachusetts. It's always good to visit and a little wistful to leave.
This morning, I treated myself to a belated Mother's Day and took the kids out to breakfast. We went to Toast and loved it. They are knowledgeable about gluten issues and we felt comfortable (safe) ordering. Homemade hash on the menu daily...yum!
Peace and love.
P.S. We've decided to remove gluten from Sag's diet for the next while (3-6 months). He has experienced enormous physical growth in the last six months and we suspect there are some hormonal/chemical shifts taking place based on new signs of inflammation (puffy appearance and higher than usual sensitivity). Cap and I are renewing our own commitments to gluten-free/grain-free...it has become a full blown family affair.
...and keeping it simple, as they say. (Which just don't come natural to me.)
• reveling in freshly vacuumed floors
• giving up colorful disposable straws for these more utilitarian metal ones...the better to clink while you drink my pretties...
• looking forward to Chinese takeout tonight. my baby got paid and it has been a stressful few days here
• figuring out the new laptop...Sag plunked down his savings to pay for half...the learning curve, as we cross over to the dark side, it is steep (and, yeah, it is time to rename this month the more accurate No Spend Awareness month)
• contemplating a life without a microwave...our workhorse veteran of, I believe, three moves and over ten years, died a sudden and quiet death this week
• anticipating quiet on the blog while we soak up some family time this weekend road tripping to MA for Mother's Day
I love weather days like today. A chilly bite to the breeze, cloudy and windy and then sunny and bright. Where in the world is it like this year round?
Normally, raspberries freak me out a bit. I put one in my mouth and it feels all wrong. I taste a smell when I eat a raspberry. These berries were so velvety ripe and delicious that I got over my initial sensory dissonance and ate half of them in seconds.
I've been a bit worried about this bush. It looks sparse and sickly compared to years past. The blossoms are stunning in cloudy light. That magenta...I love.
I could have sworn the tulip tree blossoms had already fallen. Maybe this is a second harvest?
My mom likes thee flowers and I always think of her when I see them. Pretty purple lovelies.
Sometimes the ties that bind come to me in the way someone uses words to weave a "sense"...as in common sense...living sense...emotional sense...universal sense...
Alex Chee tweeted a recommendation of this...if memory serves me correctly...which it usually does but not always.
I had it in my hand after I parked the car to return it to the library and it fell open to reveal poem-sized prose. Not prose poems, but short stories. Very short stories.
I can read this...is what I thought.
I have not been reading for a while now. These stories are whispers. Easily consumed though they take some time to digest. I love them for nudging me back in the reading saddle.
The slim volume is called Blue Has No South. And it's got a pretty, pretty cover.
P.S. I've been watching Peep Show. Very funny. Strong language. Cringes and oh no they didn't moments galore. You can watch on the website or Netflix streaming.
Talking to Vinny yesterday, I said things along the lines of...
feeling amidst chaos (Spring, Spring, you do something to me),
feeling busy (we parsed that word a bit and, yes, it means too much, but the too much is by choice and out of love and devotion...family stuff) and,
feeling overwhelmed (if one can remove one's "head"/mind from the past and the expectations that cling...the present moment can power you).
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I took an exploratory/observational trip to Costco with Tiina yesterday morning. After some analysis, I have firmly established that it is not the way to go for us right now. They don't carry our brands or applicable alternatives. Next stop: Shoprite.
Speaking of food and finances, I am running into a problem which tends to crop up when I meal plan and do the bulk of the week's shopping on the weekend. I don't have a clear enough picture of my/our schedule when planning/shopping and perishables lie fallow in the fridge while life happens outside of it.
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I took a pointer from this piece over at Lifehacker and turned off the alerts from e-mail, Twitter and Facebook on my phone. I was out of the apartment a lot yesterday and it made a huge difference.
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Lana posted this gem on Facebook the other day. Made my cells sing. (It's a rainy morning here.)
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Things have taken a turn in Sag's dreaming of acquiring a PC laptop. He has wanted one for months and months. It has been a desire born of playing Minecraft, which can be played on a Mac, but delving into the world of gaming, which like the "real" world, operates majorly on PCs. There have been paths of play and curiosity he has not been able to follow, limited by being on an Apple machine.
We discovered recently that he has been squirreling away his dollars and can pay for half of a budget PC that would seemingly be able to handle the demands he would place on it and is on sale at the moment. We may take a leap and strike while the iron is hot!
A shot from a Sunday mid-day Minecraft play. His brother was on the desktop and they were doing something together. Lots of shrieks and laughter.
Did you read the link I posted last week about the hazards of sitting? I'm going to try leaving my laptop at this "standing desk" to reduce my sitting time.
These piles? Oh they are just the beginning... So much to do and catch up on.
Our new slow cooker arrived last week and it remains in its wrapping. Hoping to get some chicken stock "tea" going this week.
Our friend Anna and rats. I had a lovely time at Roger's birthday celebration Saturday including having these inquisitive and active rodents crawl on me.
Kissing my latte while I gulp down my Dragon's Way herbs with them. It's still kind of crazytown here in my head, but I'm plugging along. Feeling accomplished for getting the week's food shopping done and staying within my mental budget. Actual budget is not written yet. Did start HSP book yesterday. Entertained thoughts of spending one of the weekend days reading, just reading. Not gonna happen. After two days of bitter sugar withdrawal, yesterday was smoother. Practicing Qigong about every other day.
Off to make some lamb stew (meat not Dragon-y but eating down food already bought is good) and some dinner chow for Gem. We're celebrating my brother's birthday tonight in a sports pub in Queens.
My mind leaps ahead to next week wanting to plan and strategize away the "to do" items that overwhelm my landscape inside and outside of me.
Very simple yet easy-to-forget fact: sitting for long periods of time is killer on the body. This post was a good reminder for me with tips on how to stay ahead of the sitting game.
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This post is wonderful for everyone, but especially important if autism is of particular interest to you. I love these two quotes the author/blogger used to illustrate his points of view:
“In many scientific problems, the difficulty is to state the question rightly; once that is done it may almost answer itself.” (from The Common Sense of Science by Jacob Buronowski)
“I don’t place much faith in my intuitions, except as a starting place for designing experiments.” (from Elizabeth Spelke)
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TLo have been writing some amazing posts about the costume design on Mad Men this season. I'm not sure how fun they would be for non-fans of the show, but I find them fascinating and eye-opening.
Creamy dulse dressing from Blissful Bites. If a recipe has a dozen ingredients, it better make true use of all of them and last awhile. This dressing fits the bill. The color is quite drab, but the flavor trips along pretty brilliantly from briny (dulse is seaweed) to citrus (lemon) to savory (Worcestershire and wheat-free tamari and mustard). The silken tofu gives it a pillowy feel while the pumpkin seeds give it texture.
This is a great recipe. I could eat it happily by the spoonful. Wonder what it will pair well with...
I don't know if this is the tastiest slaw, but it sure is the prettiest. I love the colors. And the taste bursts with freshness. It is suggested to add honey if you like things sweet and I will most definitely try that. This came out tangy. (My fault, I'm sure, as I didn't measure precisely.)
Gem did not like the marinara. I almost froze all of it yesterday, in frustration, but then calmed down. I froze half of it.
This morning I browned some ground grass-fed turkey from the farmer's market and mixed in just over half of the marinara I had in the fridge. (I am hoping Cap might make some pizza with what's left of the sauce.)
He still didn't like it (he is sensitive to texture and change and is not into how chunky this sauce is). I may blend the next batch to make it smoother, but the truth is that the "chunks" in this sauce are incredibly soft. The onions cooked for 20 minutes and melt in your mouth.
He ate more of it at lunch than he did last night. Baby steps.
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During Dragon's Way it is encouraged to eat warm foods and drink warm drinks. Most of the things I made this week are cold, literally not cooked, or meant to be served cold. Something to keep in mind when meal planning for next week.
I only used half of the red cabbage (slaw), half of the fresh basil (eggplant salad) and half of the Romaine lettuce (eggplant salad). It's nice to have leftover prepped veg for spontaneous use the rest of the week.
My friend Shannon ended up staying when she dropped her boy off to play. It was so nice to have someone to share the food with. And talk and talk and talk.
Last week I made a batch of Onion-Apple Pork Chops from Fast Paleo. The kids gobbled the chops which were moist and flavorful. I've been eating the onion apple topping.
This morning I made Classic Marinara from 3 Bowls. I didn't use toasted and crushed fennel seeds, but did add Penzey's Tuscan Sunset seasoning which has fennel and some other stuff in it. The fennel is lovely. Give the impression of meatiness because of its association with sausage. I didn't have plain applesauce (the kids fave is strawberry applesauce) so I did add honey to the sauce. For me, it was about trying to cut the tartness of the citric acid. The sauce is nice, not sure how well it's going to go over with the kids. We will see at lunch.
I also made The Silver Palate's Eggplant Salad this morning. It is a simple and yummy dish. And Dragon's Way-friendly. I had some for breakfast.
Two more dishes coming this week are: Everyday Paleo's Tastiest Slaw and Blissful Bites' Creamy Dulse Dressing. (The latter link will take you to a review of the cookbook which mentions the dressing "the pumpkin seed dulse condiment". As of yet no one has posted the recipe online.)
Peace and love (how the day goes when I get out of bed at 5:30).
Woke to thunder and lightning...and lightening at 5:15. From a dreamful sleep. Gem came into bed. I tried falling back asleep but couldn't. I used to be afraid of thunder as a kid and my nervous system still finds it involuntarily rousing.
When I started having some flashes of things to do which not only haven't been done, but had fallen off the radar somewhat, I thought my vibrations were not good for sleeping child next to me and got out of bed.
Sag got out of bed and moved to the big bed and now the three boys sleep together.
I am moving on to Qigong. And then to any one of my three lists (two on paper and one in my head).
