Tuesday, September 07, 2010

Spiraling back

I'm feeling a bit better.  The slope, gentle as it may be, is upward.

Then, I feel a sudden compression.  Whole body.  Head down, tailbone up, ears in, shoulders in, hips in.  Blood starting to pound as veins narrow and tighten.  Everything becoming a wall, and because I can't get very far from Star Wars raising these boys, for some comic relief, the image of the gang in the trash compactor comes to mind.

Pressure.  My brain gasps, my heart skips a beat.

Then, I remember my childhood recurring nightmare.  Walking along a driven snow white picket fence, entering a house that contains a bloody, wet, red organ, pumping and pumping.  It's a heart with vines of veins so dark they appear black. 

The house is dark as a moonless night and the heart is so very red.

It's grotesque.  The sight is deafening.


No comments: