My mood has been spike-y. I feel fine then suddenly very grumpy. Disproportionate, to the moment occurring outside of myself, but perfectly in alignment with what is going on inside. This transition time of chemical re/calibration is possibly bumping up against a PMS time.
I feel getting some movement into my routine would help...more and more with each passing day. But, it's hard to catch the rhythm when my sleep is still bumpy (tonight, again with the insomnia) and it's so not my weather outside.
I cried tonight, though, which was a little challenging (I was inhibited by a) wanting to not wake/shake up the kids; and b) wanting to not draw Cap out/back since he was retiring from a long and tiring day), but distinctly cleansing and restorative. I thunk some thoughts during the cry, but in retrospect, see that the act released tension that had been building internally...and those thoughts that felt real and significant, at the time, feel much less so now. Much.
It's interesting, really. My instinct to not bother, though true, was enfolded in the benefit of not being bothered, as well. Although my instinctual desire for comfort, while crying, was bald and raw, having someone else there would likely have interrupted and muddled the process. A wrench, though a tool, is not always the fix.
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